its never gone .

ahhhhhh ~!!!!

feel so good to be back .
like being released from the jail .
the moment i take mok car come back .
i saw almost a lot of things chgn .
i am so foreign to the place .

time in camp flies .
i finally managed to pass the first test .
and sort of pass the course .
of course .
2 more daes and we are done wid the whole thingy .
YESH ~!!!
FREEDOM ~!
=)

lets see wad i did in there .
lecture .
shooting .
marching .
tio scold .
stare at blank space .
sleep .
listening to my room de ppl all tok bian tai thingy .
rush out of toilet within 1 min after water come down to me .
just because sir wan to see 3 ppl . den request all of us fall in .
tmd .
nvm .
still got ....
eating ~!!!
omg i am fat .
AMAZING .
no exercise in camp .
only eat .
wtf ..~!!

sound interesting ???
nahhhh.
boredom and endure for a lot of days .
got a talk on leadership for 5 hours straight .
TMD .
ENDURANCE TEST AH .
CANT SLP .
ONLY STARE AT THE MAJOR .
ZZZZZZZ.

booking tml again.
training for our POP night performance .
THAI BOXING ITEM .
CREATIVE RITE .
=)


in the camp .
i keep dreaming .
keep thinking .
even though i know u may not .
but i am .
i could not cry out in camp .
just bear inside my heart .
write everything in my notebook .
on thursday i think .
it was a full moon .
i stared out of the block .
looking at the moon .
hearts totally moodless .
shld i just stop thinking abt a impossible ending ??
or shld i still struggle with it ??
i wanted so much .
so much for time lapse .
so that i would not have regret wad i done .
wad i would do .
wad i would hope that i could salvage the situation .
but i know .
now its only a one sided feeling .
i feel jaded . (izzit the correct word ???)
all i can do is that .
i can just care and protect her at a dark side .
somewhere where she cant see .
somewhere she wont know of my existence .
so that i can do wad i wan to do .
give her my every concern .
giving a one-sided feeling .

i may sound silly .
ya i am .
but i dont care bout it .
i just loved her too much .
too much . .
i am barely hanging on .
haish ,,.

at the putting of rank ceremony .
i dreamt of .
you .
next to me .
looking at me .
be there .
make me feel so blessed .
feel like nth else on earth .
make me realise i went thru the course with your support .
but i know .
you wont .
no matter how hard i ask you .
no matter how i want to be with you again .
........................



oioioioi .
don forget hor .
those few of you i ask u all to come my POP de .
CALL ME OK .
GO LEH .
OR MY MOM DONO THE WAY IN AND OUT .
=)