new year is here.
i dont feel excited.
cos my life doesnt feel anything changed.
just tat i gonna reach 18 soon.

ok lets talk about my life.
since its a new year.
and the time now is 350am.
i cant sleep.
zzzzz

i was born on 24 october 1990.
but i only remember being active and able to observe everything.
at around 3 yrs old.
i donno y.
i can still rmb myself waking up.
den find myself in the "bed"
you know those baby last tym used to slp in 1 ?
those hanging frm the ceiling de.
den since then i start to grow up.

went to study.
study make frens.
go home watch tv.
go downstairs i can still rmb.
block 166 and block 173.
every day play and play.
badminton. cycling. go arcade. soccer.
i rmb myself kanna rammed by a ball before.
at my most vulnerable part.
NOSE.
it lasted for 3 to 4 yrs.
i tot my happy life is over.

i reached aged 12.
i moved house.
to sengkang.
my current house.
starting is fuking small and lousy.
feel weird.
imagine sleeping in a weird environment for the 1st time.
but since i got my own room.
i dont care.
just sleep.
got own aircon leh.
xD
my 1st step to freedom.
having my own room.

secondary sch changed my entire life.
i changed thoroughly.
i joined my biggest family.
NCC.
my biggest family i will ever have.
when ppl say u wont be rebellious when u in NCC.
u are wrong.
no 1 knows how different i am at home.
no 1 will expect.
only my parents know.
had 3 years of laugh until sec 4.
where more prob and relation thing surfaced.
experienced all kinds of feelings then.
happy. sad. angry. jealous. confused. emo.
den O lvl passed.
it was like yesterday.
my holiday came.
my total freedom began.

now i am here.
i can finally describe myself.
my name is kian guan.
aged 17.
scorpio.
realised i have changed throughout my entire life.
i keep tat smile on my face, except during going sch.
i am single, and will always be single, i think.
i dont know whats happening around me.
i feel sometimes i am an idealistic person.
i want things to go my way.
but it just doesnt go tat way.
i hab a group of brothers.
i acknowledged them.
but seriously i will call brothers.
will always be those few.

whats my new year resolution ??
1. CLEAN MY FUKING DIRTY ROOM.
2. save my money to buy sth useful for my life.
3. rebuild my room. it looks like shyt now.
4. score well for exams.
5. wait for my birthday to come to be officially 18.
6. just learn to be a better man.

this is my 1st post for the new 2008.
let me give a welcome to 2008 by saying.
fuk u 2008. _|_
y u come so fast.
zzzzzzzzz